Tag: mental health
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Inside the Mind of a Serial Relationship Killer
I feel sick to my stomach because I did it again. I’m leaning over a dirty motel room sink, vigorously scrubbing the blood off my hands and uncontrollably sobbing. My body loses the energy to stand and slowly crumples to the floor. I start throwing up into the toilet. For a moment, I pause to […]
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How I Navigate Having a Partner with ADHD
When I met my anchor partner, I didn’t know anything about ADHD.After decades of developing his identity and habits, he started asking things like, “So what’s me, and what’s my ADHD? What’s wrong with me?”
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The Startup of You
Re-entering the world of dating after divorce felt like launching my own startup, except that startup was me. For months, I was trying to build the perfect product in stealth mode–doing therapy, getting stronger through pole, focusing on my new job, and fostering a community of friends.
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My Brain on ENM: Lessons Learned From Non-Monogamy
In just one year of this new identity, I’ve become super intimate with my brain. I can’t fathom how I processed life before, or what it was like not to know these five things.
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Rising to the Occasion: The Peter Principle in Relationships
People become paralyzed when context switching all the time, much like a balloon getting stuck in a tree.
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A Love Letter to Myself
It’s about time you prioritized yourself. After 30 years of caretaking and self-sabotating, allow yourself to feel selfish and focus on your own growth. It’s a rewarding journey to establish your own identity–NOT wrapping it around others–and advocate for your needs.
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What Does My Authentic Self Look Like?
San Francisco has always been my litmus test for change. While the city stayed relatively the same throughout my life, my identity drastically evolved over the years. The child that spent Christmas holidays in the Sunset District could never have foreseen coming back at the age of 30, newly divorced and openly non-monogamous.
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Daring to Set Boundaries
What if we took everyone else out of the equation and drew lines around our own wants and needs? What would it look like to respectfully advocate for ourselves and allow others to be responsible for their feelings?
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Befriending My Inner Madwoman
I’ve only started exploring the concept of identifying and reinforcing boundaries with friends and family, especially when someone claims to make a statement out of love but is ACTUALLY shame. Standing up for myself in these instances has inspired me to look in the mirror… If I’m not okay with others saying these things to me, why do I say them to myself?
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Life on the Other Side of Medication
I remember telling my doctor about our move to Denver, and she optimistically replied, “When you’re all settled in and find someone new, you might consider slowly coming off your meds.” Was she insane? I’d been taking Zoloft for a year and convinced myself I could never live without it. For once in my life, my spiraling anxiety and debilitating depression were under control.
Stefanie Chow 